Concrete Coffin / Needle Work

THOIA takes a brief, but screaming detour into the gritty, grimy belly of crime horror for the next few posts, kicking things off (I almost said kicking teeth out) with one from Don Heck and the Sept '53 issue of Weird Terror #7 ...plus a violent two page drug addiction text story from the same issue written by Ed Green and featuring more art from Heck.

FYI: Look for another Don Heck story next week!

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Needle Work

Vampire With the Iron Teeth

As you may have figured out by now, Dark Mysteries #15 (1953) is a damn good issue… well, 3 out of 4 ain’t bad anyway. And what do you know--- I haven’t posted a Hy Fleishman tale since October, so now is the perfect time to unleash this terrifically oddball terror tale by one of my favorite Golden Age artists... AIEEEE!

NEXT: The Crimes of it All!

A THOIA reader requested that I print out the lyrics to The Horror of it All movie / theme song, so here ya go, Den! If anyone hasn't heard it yet then be sure to check it out, located in my jukebox on the righthand sidebar, up towards the top.

The Horror of it All (sung by Pat Boone)

When the bats fly free through the belfry
And I hear quick steps, soft and stealthy
Through a clammy fog, so unhealthy
I feel the horror of it all.

Add a doctor mad, (I mean ingenious)
With his fresh made lab (Frankenstein, yes)
Vampires eating lunch (intravenous)
I feel the horror of it all.

When the spiders crawl swift and hairy
Through the shadows tall, dark and scary
Just one bite and Obituary
I feel the horror of it all.

Still it’s been said
The best things in life are dead
I hear even monsters have their charm
So, what the heck?
Just a nip in the neck
And I’m back in my Mummy’s arms

Though there’s just one thing that can chill me
Nights without your sweet kiss could thrill me
Life without your love that could kill me
That would be the horror of it all.
That would be the real horror
That would be the blank terror!
That would be the stark raving---
Horror of it all…

Horror of the Cannibals' Dinner

I'm all for having fun around here at THOIA, this is in fact my absolute #1 concern for all my readers. But it's also neat to learn something new and even educational once in awhile too, no? Take today's story for example: Did you know that the sound of a head being decapitated by a sword is "Swish!" Also: sometimes glancing at a panel real quick causes one to see an inappropriate sex act occuring where one actually isn't (see page 3 / panel 3.) From Dark Mysteries #15 (1953), the same tasteful issue as our last post which, thankfully likewise, left all good taste to rot.

NEXT UP: THOIA Fave Hy Fleishman!

Slow Death in Quicksand

In our last post, "The Real McCoy", THOIA reader Todd commented on the father character in that story and sarcastically awarded him the "World's Best Dad of 1954." This gave me a good laugh, as well as the idea to give out the same award to another proud papa of perfection, this time for 1953 (and from Dark Mysteries #15.) What was the point to make this excursion a family affair? Who knows, but while harkening back to other THOIA themes like "Stupidest Killers Weekend" and "Most Deserving of a Gruesome Death," it's also what makes this tale so startlingly unique, and goddamn hysterical.

LATER THIS WEEK ON THOIA: Cannibals! Gnomes! More Vampires!

The Real McCoy!

We never did unearth the person responsible for the Vampires Dance at Dusk and Monster of the Moors story art this week, and though we came up with many possible candidates, in the end none of them fit. But extra props to THOIA reader Mark Borbas who went to bat and emailed me a pile of scans in hopes of helping solve our mystery. Two other Weird Horrors stories he sent were definitely by the artist in question (see splash page examples below after today’s story), but alas, still no signature on the art, nor a credit anywhere to be found. So as our search for the Real McCoy continues, let us instead enjoy today’s gruesome tale from the July-Aug ‘54 issue of The Clutching Hand #1 one-shot, featuring some great art by Paul Gustavson and presented in glorious black and white. Gustavson was one of the many artists whose name came up this week in our “Mystery Artist” search.

(Thanks again to Mark Borbas for the scans!)

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More from this week's THOIA "Mystery Artist" (any clues?)

From Weird Horrors #1

From Weird Horrors #4

Monster of the Moors

Returning to where we left off last Sunday, Sept. 6th and the uncredited, “Lou Finesque” vampire story illustrated by--- Frank Frazetta? Bill Everett? Syd Shores? Harry Anderson? Or how about Paul Gustafson (Gustavson?) Anybody? And like “Vampires Dance at Dusk”, today’s somewhat ho-hum tale has really nice art and is from another short-lived St. John’s horror series, the August 1952 issue of Weird Horrors #2 (thanks to Mark Borbas for the scans!) Is this the same artist? Begin scrutinizing!

NEXT: More Weird Horrors by ???

The House of Many Monsters

I thought we’d have a little fun today for our Silver Age Flash Forward and check in with Moe, Larry, and Curley-Joe, (as well as The Little Monsters), with a couple silly stories from the July 1965 issue of The Three Stooges #24. Yes, today THOIA is rated G!

More Stooges Horror!

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The Little Monsters & the Under-Earthlings

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MAD MONSTER PARTY: Special Edition on DVD today!