From the August 1952 issue of Strange Suspense Stories #2
TOMORROW: We end January with another Flash Forward to the 70’s, (or is it actually a flash backwards to the Old West?) Whatever… it’s got demons, melting people, and a giant flaming skeleton so don’t miss it.
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And who knew that Mr. Cavin is also a top notch doodler?! Included with his generous donation was this stunning pen illustration he created for me--- on the back of a Korean Airlines cocktail napkin! How fantastic! We surely learn something new about people everyday.
Thanks again Mr. C, you are once again further proof that THOIA has the greatest readership in all of the blogosfear.
13 comments:
Arch didn't really stick to his half of the revenge bargain, did he?
Wow, thanks Karswell! This was totally awesome. And very apropos. One of the reasons my holiday was so extended was because I had a number of dental appointments to fit into the first few weeks of the new year. Luckily, I try to do a bit less provocative and asinine bragging than Arch--at least in the while sitting in a dentist's chair. In return, Dr. Blackwell, DDS something-something, raves somewhat less maniacally than Stanley. (All I lost was a root! The rest of my teeth are intact,) Still, I'm glad I read this after I returned from those appointments.
I appreciate the kind words.
You gotta love any title that has the word "AIEEEEE!" in it.
Mind effectively blown by the Mr. Cavin original. Course, now I'm hungry for calamari... at 10 am.
TOTALLY CRAZY STORY AND GREAT ART! JUST WHEN YOU THINK YOUVE READ EVERY SEVERED BODY PART FOR REVENGE TYPE TALE ALONG COMES ONE ABOUT A MURDERING SET OF TEETH!! THIS IS WHY YOU GOTTA LOVE PRECODE COMICS.
AWESOME DRAWING MR CALVIN!! THAT IS ON A NAPKIN??
"the dull sound of a body fell SODDEN to the floor"? ewwwwwwwww...
Okay then, what would happen if a creepy severed hand took on AIEEE The Teeth in a death match?
Whoever comes up with the best story today wins a THOIA shirt... or a plate of calamari, (which ever one is easiest to send by mail.)
Or, CONTEST 2: Whoever comes up with the best story revolving around Mr C's illustration wins a shirt too.
weirrrrrd... and probably by Bernard Bailey.
This was druggier than the anesthesia can explain.
I was going to say the same thing, this was a complete acid trip of weirdness.
In the news: A local man known as "Horror pariah" (Byron Martin to his friends)was found dead in his house at his computer. He had returned from a ridiculously long stint in jury duty to read horror stories on one of his favorite non-porno websites only to die laughing and bashing in his screen with a chunk of colored glass. His last words were "Acne...big heads, torsos...Ants...people from Missouri...tiger uncles...and killer teeth...You got me now; Kars! you have succeeded at what Ken Russel failed tio do: make me insane HAAAHAHAHAHHHAA!". Concerned neighbors say he then sang the "Dentist" number from the LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS musical before taking his own life. His teeth were mysteriously missing. In other news: Baritone-voiced alcoholic singing diva who was scheduled to recieve a teeth transplant was found strangled in her own home. News at 11:00. ;) (no this wasn't a story entry.).
Tooth and Claw
By Mr. Cavin
When the disembodied hand attacked, it came at me like a scorpion. Well, a sidelong scorpion, running on one stubby thumb and with a wristwatch for a stinger. All it could really do to me it the long run was flip me obscene gestures. It was ludicrous enough to make me laugh out loud. Not that I didn't come off as pretty ludicrous too, I imagine. All I am is a set of human teeth, after all.
But at least I can laugh at that stupid hand. And tell you all about it.
The End
LOCAL MAN FOUND DEAD:
Ahhhh, my diabolical scheme has finally paid off--- daily posting of pre-code stories really does have a psychotic, suicidal effect on readers... and since Horror Pariah has been with me the longest here it was only natural that he should be the first to fall victim. (If HP's mortician wishes, please email me your address and I will gladly mail a THOIA shirt to your mortuary for HP to be properly entombed in.)
I also want to say thanks again to Mr C for the amazing donation and illustration, and to everyone else who bothers to keep coming here and commenting.
FYI: I'll have today's post up as soon as blogger stops acting like a prissy lil cunt and actually allows me to upload an image. Sorry gang, I've been trying!
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